Audio Drama Cassette [PARAPHRASED]

Originally from (5/9/13)
Translated by Sailor Star Dust



Side A featuring Shinji, transcript of sorts:

0 seconds in to 1 minute in: Shinji and Asuka greet the listener, explain we’re listening to a cassette tape that has special messages for them. Asuka grumbles about wishing to do this with Kaji instead of baka-Shinji, Shinji replies Misato would rather do this instead of him (or how Misato would rather do that with Kaji then Asuka being there).

01:00: Asuka: “Ah, don’t Kaji-san! I’m still 14 years old! Ah, don’t! You’re going too fast! *creepy-ass sexual noises here* …That’s the kind of feeling I was looking for. ”

After this, Shinji asks if it’s bad for him to be doing this voice cassette, Asuka says yes because he’s such an idiot and the like. Then Asuka rambles about how because she’s doing this voice cassette instead of Rei or Misato, she has to do her best. Shinji this time says doing this with Rei would have been better.

2m:30ish Asuka says Shinji should say his sayings for the voice cassette first, Shinji insists “ladies first”, but Asuka will have none of that because she wants to hog the spotlight when it’s her turn. Asuka complains about Shinji apologizing so much and tells him to get going.

3m:50s First special message by Shinji, morning call: “Good morning. Hey, did you sleep well? You should get up now so you’re not late for school and so you won’t keep your date waiting and them getting mad. So it’s a good idea for you to get up quickly but uh, if you’re that tired, I’ll come and wake you up again later. Goodnight.”

Asuka complains about Shinji being “EXTREMELY BORING!!” with his little talk so he needs to do it again, cheerfully…. (Brace yourself for some good old wacky Ogata! )

5m:15s Shinji’s morning call, take two: “Good morning! (*English*) Good morning, (*English*) everybody, did you sleep well?! Okay, one two! Well then, today we’ll have a happening let’s go! *I have no idea wtf Shinji is saying with the rest* ”

Asuka cracks up at Shinji being so lame with his approach, so they move onto the next message.

6m:00s Shinji’s Answering Machine message: “I’m out right now. Please leave your message after the beep.”

Asuka yet again complains, so Shinji does it once more:

6m:30s Shinji’s answering machine message, take 2: “Yes, I’m sorry but I’m out right now. Please leave your name, number and a message after the beep. Thank you very much for calling. Please excuse me.”

It’s nauseatingly polite with how he’s saying it in Japanese and is simply a “longer version of the first one” according to Asuka , which surprise surprise, annoys her. Off to the next message!

7:10 Shinji’s encouragement message: “I mustn’t run away, I mustn’t run away, I mustn’t run away, I mustn’t run away, I mustn’t run away, I mustn’t run away, I mustn’t run away, I mustn’t run away! Right. I mustn’t run away.”

Asuka then says something–among other stuff I didn’t quite catch–about how if Shinji’s so cowardly/scared about things, he might as well run away.

8:06 Shinji’s birthday message: “Today’s the special day you were born. Happy birthday. (*English*) Happy birthday. I’m glad you were born into this world.”

Asuka says this one of Shinji’s wasn’t so bad, Shinji feels something was missing, then for some reason Asuka calls Shinji a pervert. Next one…

8:50 Shinji’s good night message: “Tonight, you have today’s truths to think about. A fun day. A difficult day. No matter what kind of thoughts and feelings you had today, tomorrow will come without fail. I hope you have a good day tomorrow. Goodnight.”

This’ll probably sound silly, but hearing this part with Shinji saying “tomorrow will come without fail” actually made me tear up; I instantly thought of EoE’s final scene…. Anywah… After this one, Asuka says it this one wasn’t bad. Shinji comments that Asuka seemed to like this serious one, and asks if she’s blushing/flustered. Asuka tells Shinji to shut up, then orders him to go onto the last one (According to Asuka, “Shut up! Let’s go onto the last one! I’m looking forward to it.”). Shinji becomes flustered, and wishes he wouldn’t have to do it….

9:47 Shinji’s LOVE LOVE call message: ….Shinji’s about to speak, then hesitates, Asuka yells so Shinji BSes maybe something’s wrong with his mic. Shinji nearly starts to hyperventilate, Asuka tells him to “calm down already, you’re a man aren’t you”?.

10:20 Shinji’s love call message take 2: ” ♪ I like you, I like you, I like you, I like you. I love you~ ♫ ”

Awkward silence, and… S: “…That was bad?” A: “That was the worst! ” Shinji’s at a loss on how to say this message right, Asuka reminds him to calm down then shows an example how to do it.

11:00 Shinji’s love call message, take 2, by Asuka: Asuka sing some…thing…LOUDLY. NO idea what, googling does nothing.

Asuka says “you do it like that!”, Shinji says there’s just no way he can do this, Asuka tells him to do it for himself.

12:00 “Fi-Fine already! …Um, I like you. I really like you… AH JEEZ, THAT’S ENOUGH!”

Asuka mentions how doing this simply was best, and apologizes about yelling at him during the phone message (I think). Shinji’s glad this is over and wants to go home, Asuka mentions they still have HER side of the tape to do with the messages. Shinji apologizes 3 times in a row for being…Shinji, not being able to do such simple things, Asuka’s annoyed, as usual (“Why are you apologizing so quickly?”).

“Leave the idiot alone and turn over the tape to hear my wonderful messages waiting for you all. Look forward to it!”

“Please listen to the Soryu Asuka Langley side.”

“And of course on the B menu side, they’ll be more service, service!”

” *sigh* You can’t see anything.”


Side B featuring Asuka

Asuka thanks everybody for “waiting such a long time”, Shinji mentions it wasn’t a long wait at all. Asuka bitches about stuff as usual and how she’ll do this better then him.

0:50 seconds in: Asuka pulls a Rei from After the End and talks CRAZY fast

“I’m Asuka Langley Soryu, 14 years old, 8th grade. I’m the designated pilot of General Purpose Humanoid Decisive Combat Weapon Eva-02. I’m a Sagittarius born December 4 and my blood type is O. My favorite color is crimson red, the color of justice. My favorite number is number one, but officially I’m the second. My favorite food is Kyushu ramen, an extra-rich one. My favorite type of guy is Kaji-san! I hate hot drinks and food, hot bathes and showers. I like to stay in a tepid bath forever.

And just for your information guys, my panties today are white with blue stripes, just normal, not slippery ones. When I strip down naked, do one leg at a time, of course. And I’m wearing a pretty matching bra cup B size despite pushing them up together, perhaps you can see it through my sleeveless top.

I attend New Tokyo-3 1st Municipal Junior High School class 2-A, and live with Captain Katsuragi Misato as well as a classmate, JUST a classmate of mine, Ikari Shinji.

Well then, that’s all!”

Shinji and Asuka babble about whatever then Asuka does her morning call.

02m:11s Asuka’s morning call: “Morning! Guten Morgen!”

S: “Um…that’s it?” A: “Yep!” S: “I think you should said more lines…” A: “Oh shut up!” etc etc. Asuka gets pissy about Shinji comparing her to Rei because of how to the point she was then Asuka starts to badmouth Misato.

03m:53s Asuka’s morning call take 2: “Morning! Guten Morgen! It’s morning~ Well, I hope you’re in a good mood today! Hey, you’re not awake yet? Hey, hurry up and wake up. Good things are waiting for you once you wake up. Come on, I can’t let you do this, right? But are you saying you’re not gonna wake up? Hey, I came all the way here to wake you up! Jeez, wake up already you idiot! *BAM!* IDIOT! IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT! GET UP ALREADY YOU DAMN IDIOT!”

Shinji gets nervous from how crazy Asuka acted, Asuka mocks Rei After the End-style, how she only says thinks like “Do as you like. -_-”

05:10 Asuka’s Answering Machine message: “Hello! I’m out for a bit right now, so please leave your name, number and a message so I can get back to you. But if you’re some idiot, then don’t you bother calling! See you!”

05:42 Asuka’s encouragement message: “Are you stupid?! How much longer are you going to be complaining about things? Being so boring is stupid. You can’t be so worried about your feelings (or some such thing). Life is about ups, downs, and repeating, but there are those people who (don’t worry about anything? (I think that’s what she’s saying)), but you shouldn’t waste time with them. Later!”

Shinji mentions something about how Rei’s a good person/has a good heart, Asuka After the End-style rants again: “Are you stupid?! That doll’s always like “I don’t know” or “do as you like”. Asuka then also explains something about being better than Rei because she’s more expressive. Asuka then rambles on soon after again about not understanding the string-doll girl’s popularity and such.

07:53 Asuka’s birthday message: “Your birthday is your special day. The day you can have anything happen, and nice things can be done. It’s a great day for chances of any kind. I hope you have a great day with love and other things. Guts, go! Happy birthday. Alles Gute zum Geburtstag! (…I think that’s what’s being said.)”

Shinji’s surprised how cheerful Asuka was, Asuka says of course she was and that Rei’s “Well, that’s good for you”, couldn’t compete. Shinji mentions how “Rei’s feeling of a mother is nice”, Asuka asks if the First is that great, and something about how he likes spending time with Toji and Kensuke too, not just Rei. Shinji mentions the fact they’re always together (because Asuka brought up the fact she has a duty to be with him) since Asuka’s pissed off he likes spending time with all them.

09:40 Asuka’s goodnight message: “Today was a bad day again. It was a day about not much and a day where nothing special happened. But you don’t know how things will be like tomorrow. *some other things that are hard for me to pick out* If you relax and go to sleep, you’ll realize tomorrow can be a good day when you wake up. I hope you realize you can be happy when you wake up. Guten Nacht. Goodnight. Have a good day tomorrow.”

Shinji’s impressed Asuka’s so serious, then Asuka once again says “First’s “goodbye” can’t compete with this”. Shinji says Asuka’s seriousness reminds him of Kaworu, Asuka asks “What’s good about that perverted homo that took my Eva and was an Angel?!”, Shinji replies: “Because it’s Kaworu-kun”. Asuka FREAKS OUT and asks Shinji “YOU WERE GAY ALL ALONG?!” “No, that’s not that case! You’re mistaken!” Asuka doesn’t seem to believe him. ¬_¬

They move onto mentioning the “Love call message” is the last one.

12:00 Asuka’s love call: “I’ll be with you for a little bit. We’re alone so we can go somewhere fun later. Finish your morning coffee first. Let’s go, let’s go. I like you. I really like you. I love you.”

Shinji’s teh impressed and apparently hoped that was directed at him. Asuka calls him stupid; says that’s not the case and that she likes Kaji-san of course. Asuka explains something about how you have to be serious with that sort of thing. Asuka then says Shinji isn’t that manly or something, then Asuka says Shinji if he forgive her for their kiss with how he couldn’t breath, he says it’s fine though he thought he’d die then. I’m not really sure what else is being said (Shinji wondering why she didn’t let him breath?) other then her saying she’ll do a message do over.

14:29 Asuka love call take 2: “Do you like me? Do you like me more than anybody else in the world? Do you want me to stay by you? You’re not bored of me? Do you like how I smell? Do you like how I feel? Do you want me? Will you cherish me? Thank you. But do you really, really like me?”

Shinji’s impressed once more with how serious she was. Shinji gets annoyed when Asuka insults him then teases him about how she went on a date with Kaji somewhere. She says she’ll do a special message just for him so he’ll stop whining about things!

16:30 Asuka love call take 3: “I hate you, I hate you! I really hate you!”

Asuka feels better after doing that, Shinji’s amused is seems.

They wrap things up with their tape and Asuka hopes people listen to her again.

17m:15s to the end.

Shinji: “Guys and girls really are different.”

Asuka: “What are you mumbling about? It’s already over.”

Shinji: “Thank you very much for spending this time with us.”

Asuka: “I hope you use and listen to my messages a lot.”

Shinji: “I’m happy you listened to my messages, too.”

Asuka: “See you again!”

Shinji: “Take care.”

Asuka and Shinji: “Goodbye!”

Asuka: “Auf Wiedersehen!”

Shinji: ” *Sigh* I wonder if I’ll have to keep on smiling like this.” (I think)

Asuka: “Are you stupid? Of course you do!”